HELLO PEOPLE

chirstmas flew by just like that

i hope you enjoyed it muchly

and presents were in abundance:)

new year's TOMORROW!

in exactly 8 hours the world will leave the realms of 2007 and step into the threshold of 2008.
as i leave the year behind,

it's that time again, to reflect and summarise everything this year has done for and meant to me.

it's funny how starkly different this year was from the last.

despite the days i spent sleeping, last year was full of events which

like fireworks, sparkled and brought to surface many feelings

but over time faded away into nothing but distant memory

in that sense, this year served as an antithesis to that transient brightness

this year was filled with anti climaxes and somehow i had a way of letting supposedly significent events flit past without even so much as stirring

yet it was the everyday little things, that have changed me.

and because of that this year's left an imprint on me in ways that last year or any other year never did.

if last year was a year for feelings,

this year would be the year for thoughts.

i'll admit this year wasnt one of my better years

but through all that stormy weather, i've grown up a little bit more.

decisions were particularly hard to make

and this year was filled with many.

giving up sth to attain sth else

i learnt the meaning of sacrifice

experienced the unyielding fists of pressure

of the dangers of expectations
my own, as well as everyone else's

i've learnt the the complexities of family

and how no one is perfect no matter how much you need them to be

well i guess now i know what kinda person i DONT wanna be.

but despite everything, this year's given me much to be thankful for.

i'm thankful for the friends who fill my days with laughter

i'm thankful for those special few who've become my pillar of strength

i'm thankful for the love i've received and the love i've learnt to give

cos really, that's what life is all about, isnt it?

and regardless of what happens next year

or how bad things might seem.

right now i'd say,

NEXT YEAR'S GONNA BE GREAT

AND I CANT WAIT!

thanks limei:)

BRING IT ON 2008! 

ok let's admit it...

we're all waiting for THE MOMENT

the one defining moment which will change our lives forever

the one second, one day,

that will knock you off your bumpy road

and into the fast track to a

lifetime of success and self fulfillment

the one discovery, incident, revelation

that will open our eyes

and allow us to attain enlightenment

the one stitch in time

where, like being hit by a bolt of lightning

we find our calling in life

and spend the rest of our blissful time on earth

enjoying that joy and happiness

right.. that's what always happens in movies and books anyway.

but c'mon let's be realistic here

how many of us are gonna wake up one day

and suddenly know what we wanna do with the rest of our lives?

correct me if i'm wrong, but most of us seem to live on a day to day basis.

waking up each day and accepting things the way it comes, when it comes.

and in some ways it's a wonderful feeling

that sense of adventure, of wondering out into the unknown future,

that even though you havent the faintest idea where the hell you're going,

it is the firm belief that it is the journey not the destination that truly matters

that gives you strength to face whatever obstacles that life can and will throw at you.

but as i reach another crossroad in life,

i wonder if that's the approach i wanna take for the rest of my life

indeed, there's much to be said about having a dream firmly implanted in your imagination and just spending the rest of your life trying to fulfil it

to dream big fantastical dreams of success and an ideal job

to imagine yourself sitting in a large office with " Chief Executive Officer" sitting snugly on your mahogany desk as your assistent comes running in with a cup of steaming hot coffee with 2 cubes of sugar and a lot of milk (which is, of cos exactly how you like it) as oodles of cash just keep rolling in.

(now you know just how materialistic i really am, try not to hate me.lol.)

or for some of us, it is the thought of travelling around the world and doing good for humanity, or creating an invention that'll change the world as we know it, or even saving the smallest of lives that gives the same pleasure and satisfaction.

but alas! this isnt my fantasy world where things just drop from the sky. reality demands payment for happiness in the form of sweat and blood. Now that you've built castles in the air, you'll have to give them foundation. believe in your dreams, believe in yourself, and fight damn hard to make them real. cos even though i might ( horror of all horrors) end up as the assistant bringing the coffee ( and probably getting yelled at for getting it wrong), at least i'll know that i've fought tooth and nail for those dreams i've had instead of spending my life wondering what might have been.

cos trust me,

nothing feels worse then living to a ripe old age

to find a pocket full of regrets and "what if's"

so really,

where do you wanna see yourself 20 years from now?

good night my dears

and sweet dreams:D

14.10.07

reading my archives

made me realise that i havent written sth truly reflective of me for such a long time.

ok i'll admit i've become a lazy blogger.

with the realisation of the ability to post pics,

and jumping right into making that a habit,

i've been following the "a picture says a thousand words" cliche

to the tee.

but like a fever i cant sweat out

it's burning into me and branding me with this ridiculous notion

that life's lil moments come in photographic 2 dimensional proportions.

so here starts the mission to end that

cos even tho it's perceptibly easier to just copy and paste pics,

it's starting to bug me that the finer details are being lost amongst the many-pixelated square thingies

gosh so much has happened

some unexpected

some beautiful

some i'd rather forget

but each and every one of these events have changed me in some subtle way

and all of them deserve the time to be reflected upon and treasured for what it's worth.

it's funny

how numb you can become

from waking up everyday and telling yourself that this day is gonna be the same as yesterday

and that tomorrow will be just the same

to go through everyday's activities on auto pilot and little in mind.

that everyday becomes a blur and you dont even bother to remember what day it is anymore cos to you it's all the same.

it's almost as scary as feeling

that fear, that anxiety,

the quickening of heart beat

and the shortness of breath.

knowing that every night you'll have trouble getting to sleep because

it is in the dark that those inner demons you've been fighting to ignore the whole day

will rear its ugly head again and rob you of the will to sleep.

that who you are is so far from who you wanna be

that the cycle of expectations and disappointments just repeats itself

over and over and over again

indeed, much love all who have been there with me

who have offered a smile, a hug

a laugh, or just stopped to talk.

it is in these littlest of things

that i have sought comfort,

and it has made things a lil easier

for that i am grateful.

it's 1 03 now

and i'm glad to say that getting to sleep's been easier

these days

and the tears less often.

gd night and blessed be everybody.

27.06.07

 hello

i guess everyone's doing the oh i'm gonna reflect on 2006 thing

and yess

it is cliche

but hey

365 days can mean totally different things to different people right?

so even tho there's 1836640378372 people out there doing the same thing

i'm still gonna do it

cos

well

i'm the only one with a story like mine.

this year was an interesting one

it was one of those years where everything happened so quickly

when 365 days went by like 365 mins

and yet it makes me wonder

how the hell so many things could happen in such a short time

but hey

it's been a great year in many ways

but i know that soon yr 2006 will become "just another year"

as life goes on and all thats important is the here and now.

(and for some; grades/$$)

but you know what

if you trully think bout it

no year's just another year

every year leaves a mark on you and changes who you are

so if i were to learn a lesson from last year?

i'd say

it would be to treasure what i have...

to treasure my true friends

cos they are the ones who truly matter

to treasure my family

cos they are the ones who taught me what loving unconditionally really means

to treasure those precious moments

cos they'll fade all too fast as we get caught up in our own lil lives

to treasure time

cos well without it we can do nothing

to treasure everything in my life

the good

cos there'll always be someone out there who has it worse than i do

and especially the bad

cos without them you'll never know what the good is

i don't really have any resolutions for this year cos well

knowing me, i'll never keep them

but i do however,

have a wish.

have a great 2007 everybody

i know i will :)

1/1/07